The Chant of Savant

Sunday 29 June 2014

We're sufferin' from CCM bug?

     Guess what. Today I’m bringing bad news to boozers. It came to our knowledge that many boozers are likely to perish if something isn't nippily done. Being a doctor of everything, I discovered a very alarming situation that boozers are facing. I discovered that many boozers are infected with a disease known as mass aboulia which causes an acute loss of motivation and will due to what we technically call Chronic Crania Malfunction (CCM). Don’t mistake this epidemic with Chama Cha Mapinduzi. Nay, they don’t relate at all save that they’re in the same hunk. This deadly disease deprives its victims the sense of self-consciousness so as to pointlessly allow those they entrusted their ulaji to eat them through robbery known as ufisadi. They tend to forget almost everything crucial and big. They only remember trivial things such as kanywaji,vigodoro, pilau (porno),matamasha and other nonsensical stuff as they forget all important things such as their wellbeing and safety.
Don’t think I am making this up. How many boozers still remember billions of dosh recently reported to have been stolen under Escrow aka screw scheme? Don’t you see suspects showing off in   mjengoni and in the public thanks to boozers’ forgetfulness? Show me who’s pressing for the billions stashed in Uswazi of Swiss banks and to be returned. Who’s questioning why the govt cheated us that it’s spent “radar change” to purchase desks that turned out to be ghost and non-existent?
          More on CCM bug, the findings indicate that those suffering from the bug are always happy with agonizing situations such as the denial of their rights, negligence, malpractices, corruption and whatnot. Ironically, those suffering from CCM show no physical symptoms but they suffer psychologically. When I was trying to answer the question why boozers are robbed days in days out in the broad light, I stumbled on this lugubrious sort of malady. Evidence points at the lack of motivation and awareness that’ve turned our hunk into shamba la bibi.
Moreover, I discovered that this bug is the cause of all miseries our hunk is facing and suffering. For instance, I found that this bug caused our boozers to allow thieves to prey on them every time they decided. Who’s questioning, for instance, a new scheme of changing our voting book by introducing what’s technically known as Biometric Voter Registry (BVR) system that helped some criminals in the neighbouring hunk of Nyayo to rig elections and get away with it? How do you introduce something complicated while your system is vulnerable? I've nary comprehended it for the hunk whose citizenry don’t have even Identify Cards to embark on such a thing.  Deplorable things that the hunk’s doing are a mystery that borders that of Mariana trench.
          After noticing such a mass abnormality, as a professional and expert in human issues, I decided to throw my weight on the predicaments of boozers to find the reason why they’re so docile and abnormal. I found that they’re not to blame. All miseries they've e suffered are not the results of their futility or naiveté but CCM.  So those who blame boozers for their predicaments, plight and fate should know that it is not their fault but that of the malady they are suffering. Thus, this is why they always have been regarded to be hangdog and credulous than never been evidenced anywhere on earth.
There are so many examples that show that our boozers suffer from CCM. Look at how the biggies tell them that the hunk’s bankrupt while the same guys have nary stopped globetrotting and stashing billions in Swiss banks. Do you remember how Saada Mkuyati told the mjengo that the hunk is bust?  Look at how they’re pointlessly and wantonly creating many districts and regions which is nothing but increasing the size of the rule. If the hunk were truly bankrupt the first thing to do would have been to trim or slim the govt. Show me a boozer who’s looking at this extravagance this way. If the hunk were bankrupt where’d it get the so-called makalio or sitting allowance that one MP says is consuming at least five percent of the hunk’s budget? If the hunk were bankrupt’d it dare to purchase oil guzzlers aka Jap Shangingis?
To cut a long story short, if we want help our hunk from this loom and gloom situation, we need to tackle the bug failure to which the situation is going to worsen day by day. Given that every boozer knows that he or she suffers from CCM, it is everybody’s duty to launch and declare war against the CCM so that we can retain our aptitude to think and function just like other normal bin Adams.
Source: ThisDay June 30,2014.

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